ARCHIVED TWHLAY II:V
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The Way He Looks at You Series
Act II: The Way You Look at Him
Chapter 5: The Way You Frustrate Him
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Story Master List: The Way He Looks at You Series
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The first signs of our previous relationship are showing. Signs, I assume, she will reject. The physician is to arrive today to confirm she is fit to pursue normal activity after her injury and subsequent coma. Doubtful, she is unwell. Part of her memory is missing; she isn’t okay.
I look forward to speaking with him to resolve this issue. If I can help bring her memory back, the need to prove myself over these next six weeks becomes unnecessary. I am prepared to win her back, but I’d rather guarantee the outcome. To know she is mine and worship her for it.
She seems interested, physically; it is her loyalty to the Rebellion that forces her denial. Perhaps I should start physical intimacy. Touch her, kiss her hand; as I did the first time we met. She was willing then, and overcome with lust. She was in a different head space; heartbroken, and craving the attention of desire.
The Jedi causes my blood to boil. He delivered her to me, then stole her from me. I know he isn’t dead, and I stand weak against him at the moment. Every second that passes without her love puts me at risk.
As I cut Jogan fruit for my Light, I glance at the breakfast I made. It was the same breakfast I had previously cooked that she had enjoyed. I had been hopeful the taste would jog her memory. Unfortunate. I eat my portion in a hurry and toss the rest.
She exits the bedroom to my relief and walks down the short hallway towards me, still wearing the unfortunate poncho from my old days. I place the fruit on the table, looking into her eyes for approval; she avoids eye contact as she sits. As she picks at the fruit, I finish cleaning the kitchen, wondering if there might be more I can do to push our relationship along. A light above the front door illuminates, alerting me of the physician’s arrival.
“The doctor is here. I’ll be back in a few minutes for you. Eat what you can while I’m gone.” I say.
She nods once, but I hear the annoyance in her mind. I pass through our front door into the unwelcoming parlor; answering the door to my quarters. The physician, who I have not seen since finding out that my Light was unconscious, looks me over once then picks a spot on the floor to direct his gaze.
“Thirteenth Brother. A pleasure.”
“Please enter, Doctor Halaeon.” I say, my expression hardening instinctively.
The nervous balding man steps inside, and I gesture for him to be seated on one of the two opposing couches. I sit opposite, leaning back in my seat, one arm on the backrest, an ankle resting on my knee.
“Thank you for coming. I apologize that Ms. Kestis fled the hospital upon waking. She was rather distraught.”
The man nods, staring at the coffee table that separates us; I take a deep breath. “I was hoping to speak with you about the reason for her distress before you see her.”
“What seems to be the issue, Inquisitor?” He asks.
“As you know, she suffered severe head trauma, and it seems there’s been a rather unfortunate side effect. One I am hopeful you may have a solution to.”
This causes the Doctor to meet my eye, the whites of his eyes clearly visible.
“It appears Ms. Kestis has lost a significant portion of her memory. Everything from the moment I met her to the moment she woke up in the hospital. I expect you to fix it.”
Doctor Halaeon sits quietly for a moment before speaking, his hands clasped tightly in his lap, not daring to interrupt me. “Inquisitor, I-”
A few shallow breaths and opening and closing his mouth a few times. “I don’t know that we…that I have the power to fix something in this realm. The brain is tricky and often does things we don’t understand.”
“You are a physician, are you not? You fix people. So fix her.” I say. My patience waning. I need her to remember me, to love me again.
His whole body trembles as he speaks. “I will assess her condition and move forward with treatment, but there is no guaranty I can fix this.”
I uncross my legs, leaning forward before lowering my voice. “Do whatever it takes.”
He says nothing and I stand. “I’ll fetch her.”
I return through our front door and see that my Light has eaten most of the fruit and is folding the cloth napkin into various shapes that fall apart from the lack of structure. She looks like her old self for a moment, like when I saw her in the restaurant after buying her clothes that first time. I walk around the table to stand behind her; she ignores me. My hand touches down on the back of the chair.
“Light, the physician is ready to evaluate you. Please follow me into the next room.”
She says nothing and continues folding, her mind complaining and ranting about my being unreasonable for not wearing the clothes she picked for me. I bite back a smile at her internal fit and place my other hand on the table near her work, leaning down towards her cheek.
“You know, if you’d like to spend more time folding, I have your folding papers from before your accident. I could get them for you.”
She swings her head up to look at me; her face inches from my own. Once she realizes the closeness, her cheeks color, and her gaze lowers to my lips before returning to my gaze.
“But you are required to see the physician first.”
Her eyebrows furrow, and she returns her attention to folding the napkin. I let out a short laugh and place a kiss along her hairline.
“You are required to see him either way, but doing so willingly will get you the papers.”
We both freeze, both realizing what I had just done. I pull away, returning to my full height.
“I apologize. You seemed like yourself for a moment, and I forgot the nature of our relationship.”
I offer her my hand. “My offer still stands.”
She considers for a moment, then rises, ignoring my outstretched hand, but allowing me to guide her towards the parlor. Doctor Halaeon stands to greet her and offers his hand to shake; which she accepts, grasping his hand in both of hers.
She’s baiting me, and I feel the distinct need to punish her severely for her rebellion. Imagining spending hours on the couch mindlessly edging her while I read, then going to bed without allowing her release. I shake my head once and return to the conversation that began without my involvement.
The two sit on the same couch and I return to my original seat. I stay quiet, allowing the examination to proceed and listening for any signs that her amnesia might be fixable. My Light is willing, staying in the lines of my request, likely hoping to receive her folding papers. She converses easily with the shaking physician, and he relaxes in her presence.
I listen carefully through the questions and don’t miss when she rejects having any pregnancy symptoms. Though I’m not terribly worried at this stage, soon she won’t be able to ignore them. Soon she’ll have my child, hopefully a son, in her arms. Both of them smiling up at me each time I enter the room, both demanding my attention at all hours. Perhaps her belly round for a second time with a second child, third child, I suppose.
There is the Jedi’s child that I must unfortunately claim as my own. Everyone is expecting two children, two of my children, not one of mine and the child of a Jedi. There would be an uproar, the child publicly killed, and my Light taken from me for information. Something I would never allow to happen; I would sooner take her to the furthest reaches of the galaxy for safety. Perhaps his child won’t survive the pregnancy, perhaps my son will best his in the womb.
“What are the odds of both children surviving?” I ask, interrupting their discussion.
The physician turns to face me.
“Ms. Kestis appears in good health despite the head injury, so it is safe to assume both children will arrive healthy and safe.”
I nod, disappointed, and they continue their conversation about pregnancy and what to expect. The doctor asks a long series of questions regarding her memory. She dodges the specifics of what she remembers to avoid aligning with the Rebellion, but says she clearly remembers that day.
He conducts a long series of response test to determine the results of the head injury. He pulls out a needle to draw blood to run additional tests for the pregnancy. I stay mostly calm but my hand reaches for my lightsaber when he misses her vein and has to try again.
“I apologize. Usually my nursing staff does this portion.” He says.
“It’s okay, you’re doing great.” My Light says.
She shoots me a warning look, not missing my hand on my lightsaber. I attempt to relax into the seat and glare at the man. He is successful the second time and collects what he needs. As the appointment wraps up, the physician prescribes medication for the pregnancy, which I will send for immediately.
“I’d like to see her back at the hospital for cognitive testing when you are able. There is only so much I can do out of the office.” Doctor Halaeon says.
“I will arrange something soon.”
We exchange pleasantries and the room falls silent as the door closes. I sigh, rolling my tense shoulders up to my ears before dropping them.
“That went well-”
“You could have been nicer.” She says.
I whip around, seeing her arms crossed and glaring at me. “He could have done his job better.”
“You brought him out here with no additional staff. The poor guy was terrified!”
“He seemed awfully at ease in your presence.”
“Are you seriously jealous of me being kind to him after seeing his fear of you?” She says. “I had to work to offset the damage you were doing.”
“Was that all it was, Light? You were being nice to put him at ease? Not that you had just rejected my hand moments before taking his so easily.” My voice raises a fraction.
I feel fiery anger in my chest, frustrated by her outburst, furious that she touches others in my presence and I can do nothing to stop it. Anything I do to assert my power will push her further from my reach. She smirks, and I hear in her mind how pleased she is with herself.
“That’s not my name! My name is-”
I close the distance between us in two steps; she tries to back away, eyes wide, but I catch her shoulders, holding her in place. “Ah, but it is your name, because I have elected to call you by it. Unless you’d prefer Mrs. Kestis.”
It’s my turn to smirk and her mouth falls open stupidly, struggling to reconcile with being so close to me. I loosen my grip, but not so much that she may escape it.
“You were a good girl during your appointment, despite your rebellion towards me. You did what I asked and cooperated with the Doctor, so I will give you back your folding papers.” I say.
She looks up into my eyes, her face turning red, her mind repeating things about “good girl” and how I look when I am being stern. So I become more stern, darkening my expression, leaning in, and lowering my voice.
“You understand that while I love you, I loathe your behavior towards me. You will not reject my touch in place of another. No touch is required when offered, but touch no one else after. Do you understand?”
“Yes, Cal.” She says, keeping my gaze, pupils dilating.
I release one hand to brush the hair off her face, allowing my touch to graze her ear and travel down to tilt her chin upward. She sucks in a breath, holding it, awaiting my next careful move. I want to kiss her, to push forward with intimacy. But she must ask to be kissed. She must ask for each part of our old relationship. It’s too delicate to risk any missteps.
“So good.” I muse.
She swallows and glances at my lips again; her thoughts equal parts hoping I’ll kiss her and scolding herself for the thoughts. I lean in more, lingering until her thoughts believe I will kiss her in this moment, parting my own lips and having a long look at hers. I move with haste; closing the distance, she tilts her head to provide better access, ready to accept me. But I don’t move towards her mouth, but past it, to her ear, leaving her wanting.
“Good girl.” I whisper. “I have a meeting soon. Let’s get you those folding papers to keep you busy while I’m preoccupied.”
I let her linger against me for a moment, her heart pounding so loud that I can hear it. She exhales out the breath she was holding and nods. I love my actions disappointed her; I love that she now needs me, that she had her hopes up to feel my kiss. Once she is ready, I guide her back into our home.
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My god ive gone down a cal rabbit hole and this is just chefs kiss. 🥺💕
ReplyDeleteI hope you stay in the rabbit hole a bit longer, this story is far from done :)
DeleteIts been almost a year
ReplyDelete